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healingfeeling's Avatar
Journalist: healingfeeling
Status: Public
Entries: 15 (Private: 0)
Comments: 0
Start Date: 12-13-2005
Last Updated: 08-17-2006
Views: 1491
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should be getting the letter today
Date Posted: 12-14-2005 at 03:40 PM
He should be getting the letter today. My fingers hurt from biting them, my body hurts from not sleeping...and my boyfriend is worried about me. I just really hope I can reach my bdad's heart and he responds. I have to chill out, but I am so wound up!!!!!!!!!

I have to realize that whatever happens was meant to happen, I can't change the past and can't predict the future.

I feel kind of weird talking to my parents right now especially my adad, since they don't know I've sent a letter...they are against the search. they don't want my bdad in my life.


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must have gotten the letter by now
Date Posted: 12-15-2005 at 09:05 PM
I am feeling a litter better today. But I feel a little helpless. I keep thinking if I send him love and good energy he'll write to me...

who knows...

another day and getting better
Date Posted: 12-17-2005 at 08:03 PM
Today I must have checked my email 30 times and the mail box 3 times. I checked the caller ID everytime I entered the living room...in case I may have missed his call. My boyfriend says I need to try to control myself and not obsess over this letter... But I've been waiting for this my whole life and can't stop thinking about it!!!

he is good though...tonight we went down to the beach with a bottle of wine and then had pizza and ice-cream! That will cure any woes

Looking forward to Sunday...a day of relaxation and the beginning of a new week.

fa la la la la la la la la
Date Posted: 12-19-2005 at 08:27 AM
Tis the season to be jolly, fa la la la la la la la la....

I hope I get my Christmas wish....and get a letter from bdad...

Does anyone have any fairy dust they can sprinkle on me so that will happen? I know it doesn't work that way...but while your at it could you also make all of my bills go away?

feeling a little more cheery today...maybe it was all the christmas music I've been listening to!

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ughhh
Date Posted: 12-20-2005 at 05:51 PM
I felt really crushed today when I went to the mailbox and all that was in there was 2 bills and a flyer of junk mail. Why on earth am I setting myself up for dissapointment? Why do I always fantasize about the letter that WILL be in the mailbox?

I feel like instead of enjoying life right now I'm just going through the motions to pass time.

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