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Adoption Community Information
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| I said to myself I wouldn't be one of those nervous pre-adoptive parents... |
Date Posted: 06-22-2005 at 04:15 PM |
| BUT I ALREADY AM! When I sent my dossier yesterday, I also sent a cover letter asking some questions (really quick questions, in my opinion). I also included all of our phone numbers (cell and two home lines) and my email address in the heading of the letter. Anyway, I thought I would get a phone call (or voice mail message) or a note today. nothing. Then I came home to check the express mail tracking number on the internet. For some reason, I guess I couldn't read the number correctly and get it to work, so I had to call the toll-free number. Anyway, I got confirmation through their automated system that the package was delivered at 12:55 today. Then I tried the web again and it worked (who'da thunk?), and the message even listed who had signed for the package (I recognized the name). Oh, well, I feel a little better already (I was already having negative thoughts that this precious dossier was lost in the mail system, and I hadn't even insured it!). Anyway, I feel loads better, and I am going to give them until Thursday afternoon before I call them  .Now I hear L is home. He always seems to arrive when I am writing a long note on the forums... I should have started this journal entry an hour ago! D. |
| Lucky 13? |
Date Posted: 06-27-2005 at 07:23 PM |
| Well, after patiently waiting for my agency to call me last week, I gave in and called them first thing this morning, so that I could put ADOPTION out of my mind and work on my thesis chapter. (which didn't work, really, by the way, because look where I am!) Well, all I asked was what number we were on the waiting list.... number 13! The person who goes over the dossier, etc., did have good news, though, that our dossier appears completely in order --- the only think she thought MIGHT be a problem is our medicals -- I didn't ask what the problem would be, I figured I will just call before my annual physical (September) and check on how far we have moved forward and THEN revisit the medical issue so that I can go ahead and ask the doctor for an additional letter to add to our dossier. Maybe by that time it can be a happy letter about lowered cholesterol levels and a weight loss of like 30 pounds (this IS indeed feasable since my doctor wrote down a weight that was, like, twenty pounds over my current weight (probably my highest EVER weight, but I think it was from, like three years ago!) -- I don't know what she was looking at, but I was so anxious to get the dossier complete that I thought this could only work to my advantage in the future, haha. Anyway, I was dreading such news, because now I will be HAPPY if we get a referral by Christmas... now I really need to make some kind of chart regarding when our docs were originally signed, when our notaries expire, and ESPECIALLY when our 171-H expires. Oh, well, you can't plan everything, can you? (Control freak reality-check). I went ahead and started my birth control pills today, because we are committed to the adoption, and while I appreciate God's blessings, I think life will be smoother for me if we don't have two in diapers running around (besides, I would hate for our homestudy to have to be drastically changed in an update). So, L (who stayed home today) and I were slightly depressed (him more so... apparently he wasn't listening to me a month ago when I was depressed about the probably wait... somehow he processed that message as a 6 month wait for baby pick-up, not 6 months plus another possible 6 months). In fact, dh asked me about possibility of getting on a waiting list for China, too... I explained to him why this would be way more complicated that I wanted to deal with right now, and that unless he WANTED to adopt two-at-once (which we are not even approved for in our homestudy or 171, thus the complications) to just drop this idea. L has surprised me all weekend about his idea of our family growing methods lately, though, as he explained he would like to next adopt a four or five year old waiting child! Well, we quickly started looking at the bright side of our #13 status -- 1) we will have more money saved. 2) dh will have lots of time off this second half of the year, since he has been saving all his vacation and needs to use it before 12/31. 3) I have more time to get healthy, etc. preparing for baby 4) I should DEFINITELY finish with my masters before baby comes... (of course, on the flip side, this sort of puts a delay on my search for a real, career job... on the other hand, it could work out just PERFECTLY so that I could apply for a teaching job to begin next fall). On an interesting note, my mom and dad went to a family birthday party and talked to some extended family members about the adoption, and the lady (step mother of my cousins) mentioned that her daughter had recently adopted a 2-year old from Thailand (my mom thinks this is the country) and is in process (or planning) to adopt another. I thought that was very cool. Apparently their son's wife is from Thailand, so I think in some way this helped the single daughter adopt an orphan from there. B even suggested that if our current plans "fall through," they may be able to help us adopt from Thailand because "they have all sorts of babies to adopt out." Geesh, I guess we should count our blessings that people our opening their hearts to our internationally adopted children, but sometimes even in their best intentions, ignorance reigns! Well, got to go for now and get back to work! D. |
| Well, same old stuff... |
Date Posted: 10-19-2005 at 09:19 PM |
| I've been working (teaching), dreaming, cleaning, not doing my thesis (that takes a lot of time)... we traveled a bit to see some family a few weeks ago. I just want to have a referral and pick up my baby! Ah, well... I guess I am just really superstressed because of too much work, too little time... not enough sleep.. At least we are moving up the referral list, #6 last I checked. I am so worried about the current hurricane brewing, and so sad about the recent hurricane and mud slides in Guatemala. Well, I need to go... so tired, and no sleep since a couple of nights ago... but I really need to grade some more papers. Ugh! I hate my current schedule, and dh is out of town, so it is difficult to sleep. Anyway, sorry to write so much senseless junk... D. |
| Wednesday |
Date Posted: 12-14-2005 at 06:06 PM |
| So sad today... Yesterday I called the adoption agency to see where we were on "the list." Number 4. Never as high as I hope before I call (every month), but moving along, so I wasn't too bummed out yesterday. Then today we got a call with a possible referral of a 13 month old. I was excited, but when I called dh at work, he said no, because by the baby would probably be 18 months old before we got her home. I have been sad and depressed all day. I thought I felt better by this evening, but then I talked to my dh asking him when he was coming home tonight, and I got all sad all over again. I know, logically, that that baby will find her way to a loving home -- she probably already has, really -- but I am just having an overwhelming sense of loss and pain right now. I am TIRED of waiting, knowing there will only be more waiting in the future, and knowing I will have to do a mountainload of paperwork all over again. I am tired of smiling and telling everyone how everything happens for a reason and our baby will come to us when it is "right." This felt "right" to me. Today, I don't know if I really have what it takes to handle the adoption process. I started this journey (research, etc.) 2 years ago, and I am just so tired. I am hoping a good night's sleep will make me feel better. Sorry for whining, but maybe no one reads this anyway. I just wanted to record my feelings SOMEWHERE I could find them later. D. |
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