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Part of: cetalley's Journal WHERE does TIME GO........I mean really GO??????? |
Date Posted: 04-16-2009 at 03:26 PM Comments(0) |
Mood: It has been many moons since I put my thoughts into my private space. I have had defeat, losses, and then TRULY losses and am left to wonder where do I go now? I still feel a CALM of sorts, about my twin sons...after all any good Mom just needs to know her children...all of them are safe. I have been dealt many more hands of cards, some have been 2's, and yet some have been full houses. I know longer wish to play cards...I truly suck at it! I wonder...does everyone have those feelings of finality..like not a lot of time left...or maybe, that you are so blessed that guilt continues to ear its head. There are so so many others with far worse circumstances, and many with no life left to live. Sometimes things seem to go very well, and maybe even one can take a deep breath, feel the wind, see the newness, the glory in what GOD has gifted us...then BAMMM! I am no longer sure of my strength, nor my ability to be able to help. The spirits are giving me many thoughts of "whys", and 'hows". I watched a "wahlela' through the kitchen window. They too, are a wonder, in and of themselves. My father used to say to be visited by a wahlela, is a sign from the GODS! OKAY, what is the meaning of the sign? he would say that when a wahlela presents itself to us, we will be visited by their spirit, the wind! Great , now I have to wait for this visit, and figure out what this spirit expects! Add that to all my others challenges, and I will be lucky to survive. I will continue another day...GOD willing!   |
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